How to deal with adultery biblically

How to deal with adultery biblically

Scripture is very clear that adultery is a sin that God hates. He explicitly mentions it in the Ten Commandments: “You shall not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14). Given the gravity of this sin, it’s no surprise that Christians are often left wondering how to deal with adultery biblically — both when they’re facing it in their own lives and when they see it impacting the lives of others.

When it comes to dealing with adultery, there are a few things we need to keep in mind. First and foremost, we need to remember that God is a loving and gracious God who is willing to forgive our sins if we repent and turn away from them (1 John 1:9). Second, we need to understand that while forgiveness is possible, the consequences of our sin can be significant and long-lasting. And finally, we need to realize that dealing with adultery isn’t just about forgiving the person who committed the act — it’s also about healing the wounds inflicted on both parties involved.

If you’re struggling with how to deal with adultery in your own life or in the life of someone you love, here are five biblical steps you can take.

What the Bible says about adultery

Adultery is a married person having sexual intercourse with someone other than their spouse. The Bible clearly states that adultery is a sin and is to be avoided. The Bible lists adultery as one of the Ten Commandments.

Adultery is a sin

Adultery is a sin. It goes against God’s will for sexual relations. He designed marriage to be a covenant between one man and one woman for life. When we go outside of that, we are sinning.

It is a serious matter. The Bible is very clear about adultery. In the Old Testament, God gave the Israelites strict instructions about it. They were to avoid it at all costs. If they committed adultery, they were to be put to death.

In the New Testament, Jesus speaks about adultery in the Sermon on the Mount. He says it includes not just the act of adultery but also the thoughts and desires that lead to it. So, if we think about committing adultery, we are already guilty of it in God’s eyes.

The Bible doesn’t just forbid adultery; it also gives us guidance on how to deal with it if we have been injured by it. If our spouse has committed adultery, we are instructed to forgive them. This is not easy, but it is possible with God’s help. We need to trust Him to heal our hearts and make us whole again.

Adultery is an act of disobedience

The Bible is very clear that adultery is an act of disobedience. In Matthew 5:27-28, Jesus said, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” In other words, Jesus says that even if we don’t physically act on our desires, our thoughts and intentions are just as bad.

Adultery is also defined as having sex with someone other than your spouse. This can include sex with someone who is not your husband or wife, such as a girlfriend or boyfriend. It can also include sex with someone married to someone else.

The Bible says much about adultery and how it can destroy lives and relationships. Proverbs 6:32 says, “But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself.” And in James 4:1-4, we are warned against even being tempted by adulterous thoughts or desires.

If you have been involved in an affair or are currently struggling with thoughts of adultery, the first step is to confess your sin to God and ask for His forgiveness. Then you need to take steps to ensure you will not be tempted to repeat the behavior. This might mean breaking off all contact with the other person involved in the affair and changing your lifestyle and habits so that you are not tempted in the future.

Adultery is an unforgivable sin

The Bible condemns adultery as a serious sin. In the Old Testament, the penalty for adultery was death (Leviticus 20:10; Deuteronomy 22:22). In the New Testament, Jesus taught that adultery is not only a physical act but also includes lustful thoughts (Matthew 5:27-28). He also said that those who have committed adultery are in danger of hellfire (Matthew 5:29-30).

Forgiveness is not automatic or guaranteed. The apostle Paul taught that forgiveness is available for those who have committed adultery, but only if they repent and turn from their sin (1 Corinthians 6:9-11). Those who have been forgiven must never return to their sinful ways (Proverbs 6:32; Hebrews 10:26-27).

How to deal with adultery

Forgive the person who has committed adultery

Although it may be difficult, it is important to try and forgive the person who has committed adultery. This does not mean that you need to forget what they have done, but it does mean that you should not hold any anger or resentment toward them. If you can forgive the person who has committed adultery, it will help you to move on from experience and also help to heal any wounds that have been inflicted upon you.

Pray for the person who has committed adultery

If your spouse has committed adultery, you may feel blindsided and hurt. You might feel like you will never be able to trust your spouse again. You might feel like you want to hurt them the way they have hurt you. But before you make any rash decisions, it’s important to take a step back and deal with the situation in a Christ-like manner. The Bible has a lot to say about dealing with adultery, and if you follow these biblical principles, you can begin healing from this painful experience.

Pray for the person who has committed adultery. Pray that God would give them wisdom and strength to repent of their sin and turn back to Him. Pray that God would restore their marriage and help them to be faithful from this day forward.

Forgive the person who has committed adultery. This is not easy, but it is essential for your emotional and spiritual health. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that what they did was okay. It just means you are choosing not to hold their sin against them anymore. Instead, you are choosing to release them into God’s hands and trust that He will deal with them according to His righteousness.

Work on rebuilding trust in your marriage. This will take time, patience, and effort. Be transparent with each other about your thoughts and feelings. Be willing to work through the pain together. Seek counseling if necessary. And most importantly, keep communication open so that healing can occur in your relationship.

Seek counseling for the person who has committed adultery

The first step in dealing with adultery is to get professional help for the person who committed adultery. This is a difficult thing to do, but it is essential. Adultery is a sin and will not go away on its own. The person who committed adultery needs to seek counseling from a qualified Christian counselor or pastor.

If the person who committed adultery is unwilling to seek counseling, then the next best option is to seek counseling for yourself. This will help you deal with the hurt and pain you are feeling. It will also help you to forgive the person who committed adultery.


Many Christians are quick to judge and denounce those involved in adultery, but the Bible is clear that we are all sinners in need of God’s grace. While there are consequences for our actions, we are called to extend forgiveness and love to others, just as God has forgiven and loved us.