Why do we become miserable?
We become miserable when we compare ourselves to others and think we don’t measure up. We become miserable when we believe that happiness comes from what we have or don’t have- when in reality, happiness comes from our state of mind. So how can we stop being miserable? Let’s take a look.
The things we can’t control
We can control certain things in life and certain things we can’t. The things we can’t control shouldn’t make us miserable, yet so often, they do. Why?
We can’t control the weather, other people’s actions, the economy, the stock market, or natural disasters. And yet, when these things go against us, we often feel down, anxious, and stressed.
The reason is that we mistakenly believe that we can control these things. If we try hard enough, we’ll be able to make the sunshine on a cloudy day or get other people to do what we want them to do.
This belief is called “control fallacies,” and it’s at the root of much of our misery. Control fallacies lead us to feelings of helplessness and powerlessness because we believe there’s something we should be able to do but can’t.
The first step to overcoming control fallacies is to become aware of them. Once you know that you’re falling victim to these thinking errors, you can start to correct them. The next time you feel stressed about something you can’t control, remind yourself that it’s not in your hands. Accept that there are some things you can’t change, and focus your energy on what you can.
The things we can control
While there are many external factors that we can’t control, such as the weather, traffic, or the actions of others, there are also many things that we CAN control. We CAN control how we react to the events in our lives. We CAN control our thoughts, our words, and our actions.
Becoming more aware of the things we can control can help us to stop feeling like victims of our circumstances. It can help us to take back our power and to start living more joyful, fulfilling lives.
Here are some things that you CAN control:
-How you spend your time
-Who do you spend your time with
-How you treat other people
-What you do with your money
-How you take care of your body
How to stop being miserable
Miserable people tend to be controlled by their negative emotions.
Change the things we can control
We all want to be happy, but sometimes it seems like happiness is just out of our reach. We can’t control everything in our lives, but there are some things we can control. If you’re feeling down and want to know how to stop being miserable, here are some things you can do:
-Change the things we can control: We can’t always control what happens to us, but we can control how we react to it. If something bad happens, try to see it as an opportunity to learn and grow.
-Manage our expectations: It’s important to have realistic expectations. We will be disappointed if we expect too much from ourselves or others.
-Focus on the positive: It’s easy to dwell on the negative, but if we take the time to focus on the positive, it can make a big difference in our happiness.
-Make time for activities we enjoy: It’s important to make time for activities that bring us joy. We all have different things that make us happy, so find what works for you and make it a priority in your life.
-Connect with others: Human connection is essential for happiness. Spend time with family and friends, or reach out to someone new. We all need someone to lean on sometimes.
Let go of the things we can’t control
We all have things in our lives that we can’t control. Maybe it’s the actions of others, an impossible work situation, or something out of our past. Whatever it is, holding on to these things only leads to misery.
The first step to happiness is letting go of the things we can’t control. This doesn’t mean forgetting about them or Pretending they never happened. It means accepting that there are some things we will never be able to change and moving on from them.
Once we’ve let go of the things we can’t control, we can focus on the things that make us happy. Spend time with loved ones, pursue our passions, and live in the present moment. These things matter most in life and will bring us lasting happiness.