It’s not uncommon to feel shy around your boyfriend, especially if you’ve only been dating for a little while. Maybe you’re worried about what he thinks of you, or you’re nervous about how he’ll react to something you say or do. Whatever the reason, there are a few things you can do to stop being shy around your boyfriend.
Try to relax and take some deep breaths. This will help calm your nerves and make you feel more comfortable.
Remember that your boyfriend is probably just as nervous as you are! He’s probably just as worried about saying or doing the wrong thing. So try to cut him some slack and be understanding if he makes a mistake.
Talk to him about what’s making you feel shy. He can help put your mind at ease.
Finally, don’t be afraid to be yourself! The more genuine and authentic you are, the easier it will be to stop being shy around your boyfriend.
The science behind shyness
Being shy around your significant other can be frustrating. You want to be able to share everything with them, but you can’t seem to break out of your shell. But don’t worry; there is a scientific reason behind why you feel this way, and there are steps you can take to overcome it. Let’s take a closer look.
The evolutionary perspective
The evolutionary perspective on shyness suggests that it is an adaptive trait that helps us to survive and reproduce. In other words, being shy around your boyfriend may have helped our ancestors to avoid dangerous situations and to find mates.
Today, shyness can still be seen as an adaptive trait in some situations. For example, if you are shy around your boyfriend, you may be more likely to carefully consider his actions and words before deciding whether or not to trust him. This can help you to avoid getting into dangerous or hurtful situations.
However, in other situations, shyness can be a hindrance. For example, if you are too shy around your boyfriend, you may miss out on opportunities to get to know him better or to deepen your relationship with him.
If you find that your shyness is negatively impacting your life, there are things that you can do to overcome it. Therapy, medication, and self-help books are all potential options for treating shyness.
The cognitive perspective
The cognitive perspective on shyness focuses on how our thoughts and beliefs contribute to our experience of shyness. According to this perspective, shyness is caused by our beliefs about ourselves and other people. For example, if we believe that other people are judging us harshly, we are likelier to feel shy around them.
There is some evidence to support the cognitive perspective on shyness. For example, research has shown that shy people tend to have more negative beliefs about social situations than non-shy people (Schlenker & Leary, 1982). Additionally, experimental studies have shown that manipulating people’s beliefs about social situations can affect their shyness (e.g., Zimbardo & Rauch, 1968).
While the cognitive perspective offers valuable insights into the causes of shyness, it should be noted that this perspective does not consider the role of biology in shyness. Additionally, this perspective only sometimes explains why some people are more prone to negative thoughts and beliefs than others.
Steps to take to stop being shy around your boyfriend
If you’re shy around your boyfriend, it can put a damper on your relationship. You may feel like you can’t be yourself or you’re not good enough for him. But being shy is just a matter of getting out of your comfort zone. Here are some steps to stop being shy around your boyfriend.
Be honest with yourself
Are you shy around your boyfriend because you don’t think you’re good enough for him? This is a common reason why women feel shy. They think their boyfriend is too good for them and that he could do better. If this is what you’re thinking, then you must be honest. Ask yourself why you believe this. What evidence do you have to support this belief? Once you question your beliefs, you may realize they are untrue. This will help you to stop being shy around your boyfriend.
Don’t compare yourself to others
One of the main reasons why you may feel shy around your boyfriend is because you compare yourself to other girls. Whether it’s his ex-girlfriend, a girl he talks to at work, or one of his female friends, you can’t help but feel like you’re not good enough.
Stop comparing yourself to other girls and learn to love yourself for who you are. Once you start accepting yourself, you’ll find that your shyness around your boyfriend will disappear.
Be assertive: One way to stop being shy around your boyfriend is to be more assertive. This means you must start speaking up for yourself and expressing your needs and wants more. It’s important to remember that being assertive doesn’t mean being aggressive, so try to strike a balance between the two.
Communicate openly and honestly: Another way to stop being shy around your boyfriend is to communicate openly and honestly with him. This means that you should share your thoughts and feelings with him and be open to hearing his thoughts and feelings. If you find it difficult to communicate with him, try writing things down beforehand to have a reference point.
Practice social activities together: A third way to reduce your shyness around your boyfriend is to practice social activities together. This could involve doing things like going out for coffee, going for walks together, or even attending social events together. You’ll gradually get used to being around him and feel more comfortable in his company by doing social activities together.
Don’t compare yourself to others: A fourth tip for reducing your shyness around your boyfriend is to avoid comparing yourself to others. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that other people are better than you, but this isn’t true! Everyone has strengths and weaknesses, so instead of comparing yourself to others, focus on accepting yourself for who you are.
Practice makes perfect
The best way to stop being shy around your boyfriend is to practice, practice, practice. Get used to being in his presence, even if it means just sitting in the same room and reading or watching TV. The more comfortable you become with him, the less shy you will feel. You can also try different role-playing situations with a friend to help you get over your shyness.
The most important thing to remember is that you are not alone in feeling shy around your boyfriend. Feeling a bit nervous or self-conscious in a new relationship is perfectly normal. The key is taking things at your own pace and building your confidence. Once you feel more comfortable, you will find it easier to relax and be around your boyfriend. Enjoy the process, and don’t put too much pressure on yourself.